Here is, 1. A charge given to be faithful and constant to our friends,
our old friends, to keep up an intimacy with them, and to be ready to
do them all the offices that lie in our power. It is good to have a
friend, a bosom-friend, whom we can be free with, and with whom we may
communicate counsels. It is not necessary that this friend should be a
relation, or any way akin to us, though it is happiest when, among
those who are so, we find one fit to make a friend of. Peter and Andrew
were brethren, so were James and John; yet Solomon frequently
distinguishes between a friend and a brother. But it is advisable to
choose a friend among our neighbours who live near us, that
acquaintance may be kept up and kindnesses the more frequently
interchanged. It is good also to have a special respect to those who
have been friends to our family: "Thy own friend, especially if he have
been thy father's friend, forsake not; fail not both to serve him and
to use him, as there is occasion. He is a tried friend; he knows thy
affairs; he has a particular concern for thee; therefore be advised by
him." It is a duty we owe to our parents, when they are gone, to love
their friends and consult with them. Solomon's son undid himself by
forsaking the counsel of his father's friends. 2. A good reason given
why we should thus value true friendship and be choice of it. (1.)
Because of the pleasure of it. There is a great deal of sweetness in
conversing and consulting with a cordial friend. It is like ointment
and perfume, which are very grateful to the smell, and exhilarate the
spirits. It rejoices the heart; the burden of care is made lighter by
unbosoming ourselves to our friend, and it is a great satisfaction to
us to have his sentiments concerning our affairs. The sweetness of
friendship lies not in hearty mirth, and hearty laughter, but in hearty
counsel, faithful advice, sincerely given and without flattery, by
counsel of the soul (so the word is), counsel which reaches the case,
and comes to the heart, counsel about soul-concerns, Ps. lxvi. 16. We
should reckon that the most pleasant conversation which is about
spiritual things, and promotes the prosperity of the soul. (2.) Because
of the profit and advantage of it, especially in a day of calamity. We
are here advised not to go into a brother's house, not to expect relief
from a kinsman merely for kindred-sake, for the obligation of that
commonly goes little further than calling cousin and fails when it
comes to the trial of a real kindness, but rather to apply ourselves to
our neighbours, who are at hand, and will be ready to help us at an
exigence. It is wisdom to oblige them by being neighbourly, and we
shall have the benefit of it in distress, by finding them so to us, ch.
xviii. 24.